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It’s been too long

February 19, 2008

My friend S. visited this past weekend, with her 20 month old daughter, who I had never met before. S. and I met and became close friends 11 years ago (!) while working together on a political campaign. When I met her just after she was hired I remember thinking, “Who is this young, inexperienced girl who can’t start right away because she has to go to church camp?” (Okay, my attitude about religion was not always welcoming, but I’m getting better.)

When the campaign ended S. went halfway across the country for grad school, and I stayed in VA and politics. I visited her a couple times in the first couple years, and would see her on some of her road trips, mostly on stops here on her way between the Midwest and her mother’s home in Fla. The last time I saw her however, was almost 4 years ago. Bug was an infant, we had just moved into our house, she had just gotten married. Since then I guess kids, jobs, life in general has prevented us from getting together. Now S. is married, has a daughter and has moved to NC for her husband’s job. She’s now about 5 hours from me, which is a lot better than the 18 hours away she’s been all these years.

S. and I share political views, but otherwise we are very different. We grew up in completely different places and family situations. And we have gone in very different directions in our careers. She left her PhD. program in Political Science to go to seminary. She’s a minister (this is one of the reasons my attitude about religion is improving). She literally realized what she should do with her life, and did it. I hesitate to call it a “calling” because I know some people think that is a cliche. But I think that’s what it was, and that’s how she would describe it. Maybe I’m still waiting for my calling?

So we’re different. But this weekend was one of the best I’ve had in a long time. We didn’t do anything historic (like my previous weekend), we didn’t get wild and crazy (which we have been known to do), we didn’t do anything that didn’t involve the kids. But I felt like she was my best friend who I see and talk to everyday. I love that there are people who I have that kind of relationship with, who I’m that comfortable with.

S. and I did get wild and crazy – a lot. Our typical day in 1997 went like this: work our asses off from 8 am until about 6 or 7 pm. Go to the gym for an hour (okay, so we did this a few times), come back to work for an hour. Go out for nachos, margaritas and cigarettes. Lots of all of the above. When the campaign was over we went on a wild and crazy cruise. A few months later, she moved to Aspen briefly. We got wild and crazy there. Same goes for the Midwest city she moved to for grad school. We had some great times, many of them I don’t even remember (that tells you a lot).

But we had as great a time this weekend, when we weren’t wild and crazy. Yes, there was wine involved (when isn’t there?), but we had as much fun taking the girls to the Children’s Museum  and having dinner with our old boss and his family as we did sitting up late, talking and drinking.

I guess my point is this: we get older, our lives change, and I believe that we should welcome those changes. But some things don’t change. And I hope that my friendship with S. is one of those that doesn’t. Love ya, Miss S. Let’s not wait another 4 years!

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